Everybody Is A Star

Remember that ex-boyfriend or girlfriend who just won't let it go? You know, the one who's probably fixated upon your Facebook profile right now, hitting refresh every 15 seconds in a self pitying attempt to figure out what you're doing and who you're doing it with. The very same one who sends you text messages at 2:30 AM saying they're at the same resort in Cabo you both went to the year before, and they're walking on the beach. Alone.

Well, the New York Knicks have a crazy ex too. His name is Stephon Marbury. And he has taken it upon himself to go all Glenn Close, ala Fatal Attraction on the Knicks (can't you hear Starbury telling Knicks brass, "I'm not gonna be ignored").

On Tuesday, Starbury, he of the $20,840,625 salary and face of the $14.98 and under Starbury shoe line, decided to stalk his ex at the Staples Center to watch them take on the Lakers.

Earlier this month, the Knicks banned Starbury from team functions. This came as a result of Starbury refusing to go into a game when the team was shorthanded due to injuries and pending trades.

But Starbury wasn't attending the Knicks/Lakers game as a player. He paid for his ticket and took the game in as a "fan".

At halftime, Starbury told reporters, "All I've got to do is get free. Once I get free, the team I'm going to go to, I think a lot of people will be shocked."

Really, Steph? What team could that be? Maybe the Minnesota Timberwolves? That would be a real treat for NBA fans as Starbury could partner with his cousin, Sebastian Telfair, to form the biggest punk backcourt in NBA history. Telfair can be in charge of concealing firearms aboard the team plane and Starbury will monitor the T-Wolves internship program.

The Starbury Saga serves as yet another reminder about what's wrong with the NBA. Guaranteed contracts seemingly guarantee one thing - prima donnas. How someone not affiliated with a golden parachute or AIG can earn $20 million for doing absolutely nothing is a disgrace to humanity.

Countless Americans are struggling like never before and Starbury is prancing around the sidelines, flaunting the fact that he's earning a paycheck to not work.

If David Stern can destroy professional basketball in Seattle, then he surely can step in to this matter, void the remainder of Marbury's contract, and slap him with permanent expulsion for being a punk.